Mr. V

I love Mr. V.  He makes me laugh, even when I hate him he makes me laugh.  Like most I have gotten caught up in the Twilight frenzy.  I enjoyed the books (even if they are not scholarly) they are a fun way to escape, and even thought the movies are not Emmy winners they definitely fill my need for teen angst.  The reason why I love my husband is because he knows this, he laughs at this and yet still participates in it while mocking me.

He plays Vampire and Werewolves with Emily.  When he nuzzles Emily's neck and gives her kisses to make her laugh, he is a vampire.  When he tickles her with this hand on her tummy he is a Werewolf.  Not a hard game to catch onto but we love it.  He bought Emily a tin with sweet tarts in it that says team Jacob.  I am team Edward.  Bryan says they are on team Jacob because they have brown skin and are always hot - so they must be werewolves and I must be a vampire cause I am pale.  Thanks B.

When Twilight the DVD was release, he waited out in the cold at Target in line with Emily (she was 3 months old at the time - and obviously bundled up) while I was on a girls trip.  He wanted to make sure I had my movie.  He still gets good husband points for that one.

He does these things every now and then that make me love him all over again ....  

The Scale

I love it when you start to workout - you go straight to the scale for proof - like two classes will suddenly shave off 10lbs (don't I wish).  It didn't but I actually feel better about myself and I am wondering where all the "what have you been doing you look amazing" comments are... must be patient.

My last class was a 90 min Hot Yoga class.  Like the class and the challenge... however I am not sure about the teacher (I think he thought I was stupid) he was a bit rough (not friendly at the front desk) and of course I made it all about me and how I didn't fit in... silly I know.  He however was a good teacher and explain things really well...maybe just has to work on his customer service.

Anywho - I am now a member and who knows maybe I will start eating healthy and give up my my Mt. Dew for breakfast - highly doubtful.

Sooo I realized that I had very little to say

and so I stopped blogging - like I really started let's be honest. Oh well, here I am again. I have started something new. Yoga. Seriously. I was on this kick of not working out and trying to lose the baby weight...since it seemed to be working. The less I did the less I weighed. Amazing I know...till I looked at my ass and realized it was sagging... you may think this is a moment where I am exaggerating but it was. Then my cousin comes in with her cute pre-baby body all adorable and I was my bitter self and asked what she was doing. Corepower Yoga. She loved it and wanted to take advantage of me by taking me to a class, which by the way she gets a $5 credit by doing so...

Of course I wore like 3 layers of clothing to hide my kangaroo pouch (that is what I am calling my extra skin that did not magically snap back into place like all the Hollywood moms that have a plastic surgeon waiting in the birthing room). I went to the sculpt class, a heated room, hybrid arobic/yoga class...not the Hhhhmmmmm kind of yoga class (or is that meditation?). Anywhoo, got my ass handed to me, and I kind of liked it.

However, the class was full of the skinny older women with huge (overly perky) boobies. Or else, young girls with pre-baby (perky) boobies. There was money in that room lets just be honest.

I then decided maybe to try other classes... and I found the Hot Fusion Yoga (Hot Yoga with a fancy name). I love it...I think I may even shed one of my layers here soon. But lets not kid ourselves quite yet, my kangaroo pouch is far from gone. But I can feel myself becoming more flexible - I don't want to kill my husband when I get home (he thinks this is a plus) and in all honesty, it is "me" time. We all need "me" time.

I am not going to pretend to be the convert who is going to start eating oats and grass for breakfast, I didn't start these classes to find my inner- self, I know who I am and how strong I am and yada yada yada - I am a sarcastic shit- who sees things how they are. I am a mom with a kangaroo pouch who is desperate to feel pretty again.

I am sure there are moms out there who would say "you created a miracle...be proud of the scars etc." but it is more than that. It is more than that - it is my own identity which I plan to keep intact and not morph into someone who lives through my child but lives with my child.

Wow... when did I get on to the soap box?!?! Getting down now.... anywho I thought I would start posting about my experiences and observations and see how that goes...

To all lovers of Crepe Paper

It has always been a tradition in my family to decorate the birthday girls door, or at least to decorate the bathroom mirror with crepe paper and or anything fun you could find. My mom was always the best. For my 16th birthday (my golden birthday) she bought yellow crepe paper and wizard of oz paper plates and such - to play on the gold theme - plus it is my favorite movie by far. She was also a great Santa, Tooth Fairy and Easter Rabbit - but that is another post. I have carried on this tradition for my college roommates - friends at work - and my husband. Exhibit A: B's first father's day.

We named the bull George. It is a little bit more humorous when you realize my husband is Hispanic - which i love to give him grief about since I am pale as a ghost. Obviously Emily has his tan ;o) But ya he got a pinata and chocolate milk for father's day...and a wake up call at 6 am. He thought the house was burning down when I yelled for him...I just wanted him to see my decorations.

So as promised here is proof my daughter is going to be trouble in the near future - try the next five minutes. She is a ham to the full extent, flirts with old men at the grocery stores, restaurants, home improvement stores etc. I swear she even throws out a wink or two. She already walks all over dad. She has grandpa on floor playing silly games and then beats grandpa up off the floor, not an even match.

As for me I don't fall for her tricks, I know them all too well...

Really I do...where do you think she learned them from...

Motherly love

Now I do not give my self a gold star on being a mother, quite the opposite...I am the one who is okay if their kid eats dirt, tries to climb the stairs by themselves, love on all animals. My husband - he is on the other spectrum...uber protective.

My favorite quote from my mother (while I was pregnant) "I was worried you weren't going to have kids, I was always afraid you would eat them or something...) Thanks mom, but it was true.

But I love Emily - that is her name (again probably breaking some mom rule by posting her name - but it is such a good name - Emily Aurelia V.). She has my sass, her dads humor and her own will and determination. Also she has great fashion sense already - she plays with my shoes and drapes my winter scarves over her shoulders and brings me her sunglasses to be "groove baby".

But there is one mother that truly inspires me right now - not to become a mom that I am not, not to be more religious than I am...but to have a spirit that can endure, a spirit that can find beauty and truth in sorrow, a spirit that can remain so giving and uplifting when something so treasured is gone.

Her name is Natalie Norton, and if you have time stop by her blog. Send her your love, and be inspired by hers. She is truly LOVE.

And I believe I have O.D. on my niceness for the day...more sass on the way

Dress Code at Work Part I

The Don't first ....cause that is the easy part....

1. Leggings are not an appropriate choice for pants
2. Jean Skirts should be left at home, and on your teen-aged daughter
3. Sweatshirts are taking casual day a little to far...esp. if Mickey makes an appearance
4. Skirts should never be to tight, too short or too long
5. Fishnets are better left in the bedroom
6. White tights don't work - ever - even with boots
7. Speaking of tights, they are not leggings and should not be worn as such
8. Colored Bras should not be worn under sheer blouses
9. However, wearing a bra is always a must...
10. Heels, if you can't walk in them they don't look good even if they cost $$$$
11. Heels should not be clear...unless you don't work in an office...just sayin

I know we all have days were we sport a don't...but tomorrow is another day...just don't do it again ;o)


Now here are the Dos:

1. Sport a bright color, you won't believe how many complements you will get - however this is not a go for neon...
2. A pencil skirt never looks bad, consider it an instant investment in class
3. Black tights are a great way to avoid shaving on days that you have forgotten or just didn't want to
4. Have a great statement necklace (even if it comes from forever 21)
5. Invest in staple pieces, yes they can be a bit spend-y but there is also a sales rack - go at the end of the winter season for great wool pants, end of summer for lighter weight - and tada you have a wardrobe!
   
6. Never pay full price - there is never ever a reason for that (trust me I work in retail)
7. Shoes - add some spice - but also have a pair of black/brown pumps
8. Get that signature perfume, get one you love...not what is promoted by the next big celebrity - your sent is you, and you have to love it.
   
9. Confidence, is the best thing you can wear at work, wear something that makes you feel powerful, strong, and confident...it will start your day off right, and lead you to great places, believe me people will notice, not just the outfit but YOU.

Do your do, and do it well!

Facebook Stalking

So I know why people friend me on facebook. Because I left Texas, because I got out of the small town I grew up in and they are interested in seeing if I made anything of myself (and also probably because I am married to my husband and he was the popular one back in the day).

Well, I accept their friendship mainly to say a big F- you, I did do something awesome. I did graduate from college, actually did something with my degree and have worked for two major (and might I mention well known) companies. Yes, me and my husband got married, we have a beautiful daughter (I am not at all playing the biased mother - will include proof later on ;o)) and yes, even after all that, I have maintained my figure and weight! Ha.

But I am not a mean bitter person (okay, might be just a little) but really what is facebook really for...people say it is to stay connected, and I will agree to some extent. But how often do you message those 542 friends of yours that you barely remember?

No, the fact is you stalk them. You see what they are up to in life, you rate your life against theirs and then move on.

Or else, you stalk past crushes...god knows I do, or ex-boyfriends/girlfriends.

That is what facebook is for. It is a way to measure yourself against others, and it is either greatly satisfying or just a great way to depress yourself further. You get to see if that person in the past has changed, gotten better style, or still stuck living in the past. Granted some people really do surprise you, and others make you glad that you have moved on. Facebook lets you peak into the past while making you thankful for the future, no matter who you are.

And in all honesty, this is why I love facebook.

I am known to Exaggerate stories

I am known to exaggerate stories, or so that is what my husband says. But the fact remains, I can tell one hell of a story.

It might have a few embellishments here and there, but really all the facts are there.

My story as of right now is that I am married to my high school (actually 8th grade) sweet heart, and we have a daughter who just turned 1 which means my world is now utter chaos.

Now don't be quick to judge and think we are this perfect loving adorable family, we are not. My husband and I banter all the time and pick on each other day in and day out, but that is how our relationship has always been, seriously if you didn't know us and didn't know our humor...you would wonder why we were together. But I love him, and he loves me...sometimes ;o)

I am jaded, very sarcastic and in all honestly not entirely nice. I love fashion, retail and gossip.

My husband on the other hand is the complete opposite. He thinks the best of everyone and everything. He was the Prom King...that should sum everything up. But he really is the nicest guy and has great humor (and legs).

However, I have brought him over to the dark side just a bit...he now participates in people watching with me. It took over 10 years, but I got him. He now can catch my eye very slyly and we both know that we have seen the offender. He use to be horrible at it, very obvious, which ruined the fun.

Now you might be starting to think, wow this girl is mean, and you might be on the right track. My personality has been know to offend a few and rub others the wrong way. But here is the thing...I have never claimed to be anything other than me. I do have a big heart, I am a truly loyal friend, and will be over in a moments notice if your heart is broken and need a gossip mag. to show you that your life could be worse (example at the time was Britney & K-Fed). But I am a bit snarky, I will admit to it.

So I will warn you now, I will offend you at some point in this blog...but it is just my point of view, and believe me I know it doesn't mean much. There are many others in your life whose opinion should mean more to you than mine. So just keep that in mind and I hope you enjoy!