so after the paci party

we are trying to conquer the sleeping in the big girl bed... yeah daddy is not helping that situation (you would think it would be backwards but it is not).
 
So tonight I put Emily in Eli's crib. Whoa did not sit well with her.  She was mortified by it.

She is a girl. As she explained it to me. Not a boy. So therefore she should not be in  a boy's room nor a boy's crib.  Logic at its best.

So after she chose to sleep in the big girl bed, hysterics ensued.  This is the point in which I encourage others to live their single lives to the fullest... cause I am trying to sleep through "it's not my fault ...it's not my fault.... mommy ..... mommy...." without feeling like a shit parent.

Those lovey mother and child pictures all over facebooks... yeah full of shit.  FYI.  It is a bunch of people trying to pretend that they have a picture perfect life with kids... no they are not going to take pictures of their trashed house with Lucky Charms all over their floors or Crayons all over their walls... so please if you feel envious of their lives please know they are envious of yours times 10.

Esp. after sleepless nights.

Even if their kids are cute as hell.

I promise.

So go to 1 too many concerts and get shit face 1 too many times .... cause it will all be worth it when the kids come.

And yes you will love them no matter what.... but do take advantage of your time while you have it.

Meanwhile ... back to "It is not my fault" aka you are a horrible parent.....

Took a Break from Life

Okay so I am back, kind of.

Sigh, I have had a good bout with the baby blues hence going back to work early... I know, this seems like the reverse thing to do... but I needed to get back to a routine, I needed grown up contact, I needed a project and to be busy with the world.

I also needed a little bit of help from some "happy pills" for full disclosure.  I am not going to lie, and pretend that I can handle this solely on my own... thank god for my mom and her ability to just listen to my rants and raves and just to come and save the day every now and then. And to clean my house when I have given up for the whole week.

Bryan has been wonderful, even though he has no clue what the hell baby blues are and what he can do to help - he just tries to be lighthearted about it and bring out the funny in the situation - which I really do appreciate...

So back to work I am.  I have a new manager and a new merchant which I am really excited about.  My role has slightly changed (in a good way) and I am try to change and adjust to the new norm... slower than I would like but I will catch up soon!  I have a lot of good people backing me and I feel good about it all.

Emily is being an awesome good big sister, and we are trying to get rid of the Paci.  We are on day 2 night 3... Yesterday we had a "No More Paci Party". 

The deal was, I forgot the Paci at daycare Monday night - uh oh - so I quickly took advantage of the situation and told Emily that if she went to bed without Paci, and did daycare without Paci she could have a party with a cake... Well she did awesome, and Tuesday I went and bought a huge butterfly balloon, a muffin sized cupcake and decorated her room with tulle and sparkle beads...

Party was a huge success, we danced with stuffed animals, cheered about no more paci, and how Emily was a big girl....she loved it.

Then came bedtime.

Big meltdown.  The "I hate you mom" kind of meltdown.  She even tried to negotiate for her Paci back.  She told me to take down the decorations, take back the balloon and give her back the Paci.  I was actually really impressed by her logic.  But no dice.

I think I spent a good hour listening to her rant and rave.  If Bryan had been there, he would have caved.  But I have a heart of stone ;) and want to be done with the Paci.  We shall see how tonight goes!

Eli is great, starting to smile and that makes my ego go through the roof... I am pretty sure he thinks I am the best looking mom he has ever seen!

T-O - Double Dizzle aka. Todd the cat is doing well... we still know the odds there but feel good about being able to give him a good kitty life however long or short it is.

Thomas the man cat is not thrilled with this.  Not at all.

Otherwise, life is almost into a groove but more like a manageable chaos... just the way the Vargas family likes it!

You Are Worth It

I use to buy shoes all the time.  Great shoes. Unique shoes.

Now I am a mom. Of two. 

And now my hobby of collecting shoes has slowed.  BIG TIME. 

And with that so has the general up keep of myself.

And so today, it took my mother to remind me that I am worth it, I do deserve it and I should not feel guilty about taking care of myself.  Bobbie Brown Cosmetics now considers me a "good" customer.

I have been surviving on the bare minimum, living in sweats the last two months and today was my day.  I think mothers sometimes equate sacrifice and taking care of everyone else first with love... and yes in some cases it does, I am not saying sacrificing a liver to save a life does not equal love...but what I am saying is that mom's need to take care of themselves too.  And value themselves so that they remain happy enough to make that dinner at night, or be okay with scrubbing off that crayon off the hardwood floors.

Now don't get me wrong - I know my value and I am greatly underpaid!!!! ha.  But it really did take my mother giving me a "talk" on the way home so I didn't hyperventilate from the amount of money I spent on makeup.   But tomorrow is back to work day and I needed a little pick me up since not all my clothes fit yet.

So yes, Grandma's visit was much needed. Esp last night.  Emily got super super sick (like puke in mom and dad's bed multiple times sick) and of course right in the middle of that Eli decided he totally needed in on the attention -sigh.  I felt my mental state slowly slipping into insanity but then Grandma Mimi stepped in to save the day and handled Eli (meaning she threw herself in front of the baby spit up and took one for the team).  So we were extremely lucky to have a grandma in the house.

And to top it all off, the office is somewhat an office - minus a desk (finding the right one) but we can totally walk into and out of the room and I am proud enough to leave the doors open!!! SUCCESS!!!

And all the laundry is done (again kudos to mom) including the puke-y bedding and towels.

Now I must start to pick out tomorrow's outfits, pack Eli & Emily's daycare bags and mentally prepare for my morning of chaos.

Might throw a bubble bath in there somewhere too!

Happy Labor Day Everyone!