So if you haven't noticed I haven't been blogging as much, and the reason for that is the fact that I don't want to be a Debby Downer.
But I am in such a funk right now that it is really hard for me to see the light at any tunnel let alone one, and let me add this small little disclaimer that I am well aware that there are many many many in this world that have it far worse than I do, and that is probably why I have avoided this type of post.
But here I am. Realizing that my anxiety is completely out of control. Tear are at a moments notice. I want to escape from every moment of the day and I just can't so I have to just get through each one. It is slowly tearing me down and I can't seem to get one foot going in the right direction for the next to follow.
And this is the hole I am in. Am I really in it? No. Can I fake my way out of it? I hope so. My new strategy is to try and get out every morning for a walk... just to clear my head which is my own worst enemy. Next strategy is to start filling my head with all the good like things I am grateful for that I may take for granted, and things that I am actually good at, things that I did that may have helped someone else the previous day.
I pray that this helps me get out of the foggy mess I am in.
Another tactic I am going to start to try is to stop bitching and whining. What is helping? I have got to start doing things that are actually going to help me... like putting away laundry the moment it is done in the dryer, packing up the night before so I can get to work faster and in a better mood, cleaning off my desk at work so I don't feel like I am surrounded in chaos.
Sigh. Tomorrow is the start of the turnaround. Wish me luck.
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